Fix state machine for opensent/openconfirm

[samrussell]

Currently we make the other peer send the first OPEN message, but in practice we need to either send an OPEN message when the connection starts, or start a timer that eventually initiates with an OPEN method. Both of these would then move to the OpenSent stage which hasn't yet been defined.

The current behaviour is as if we have an OpenDelayTimer set with a super high value which isn't necessarily wrong, but isn't the right intention (and makes it harder for us to build active peering)

[samrussell]

Remember this is different from passive vs active connection - that just decides whether you're trying to open a TCP connection. The OpenDelayTimer login happens regardless of who initiated the TCP connection.