mastery.txt

- when we start new instrument, we are confused, the knowledge we need is over
  our heads

  when we start a new job, we are subjects to our judgement, piano looks
  intimidating, we don't understand relationships between cords, pedals,
  everything else that goes into creating music

- we give in to feeling of hopelessnes when we see how much there is to learn,
  we stop observing and learning, the process comes to halt, however if as we
  continue to observe, we gain fluency, we begin to see connections that were
  invisible to us before

- we move from student to practitioner, we stop learning how others do things
  and we bring our own style, as we continue, another leap takes place

  we learned the rules so well that we can break or rewrite them

these steps happen:

1. appreticeship (we learn how others do it)
2. creative active (we see inside the machinery, experiment and play with
   elements involved)
3. mastery (we can see the whole picture with complete clarity, we can touch the
   core because we can see it all, we call it intuition)

----

what is new and essential for me to learning, that i don't know or should do to
improve?

----

intuitive powers at the mastery level are a mix of the instinctive and the
rational, unconscious and conscious, human and the animal, it is our way of
making sudden and powerfull connections about the environment, to think inside
things

we used to be able to use these, but they were drilled out of us due to new
information that we have gained (i thought about that already!)

our eyes are not meant for immediate scanning, but for deep and focused analysis
of depth, the longer we intensely look, the more we can make sense of it

---- i dislike that there are no concrete stories and proofs ----

we can receive feelings when we observe others do, practice, chimpanses,
scientists have performed experiments
that is due to our social nature that we have to cooperate to survive

* we usually think out of the box and create astonishing things when we don't
  try to intentionally think out of the box, we create breakthroughs by
  continuous efforts, creation and deep intense focus on the goal

-- 1. who am i and what is my true desire that i will to sacrifice everything
      for

retain that childhood desire and chase it at the cost of everything

follow your mind, what you naturally desire, one mind flows into another
(leonardo da-vinci drew an angel in a way he desired and became obsessed with
birs and thoughts of science behind the flying, he spent hours every week
studying everything he could find) -- i can relate to that for affinity my mind
has towards studying

do what your mind does the best, leonardo da-vinci decided to be all he wants to
be and pursue all he wanted, he made a living of it because that's the way he
functioned the best (i had crisis yesterday hating job dependance and realized
to follow what i want, i need to do it all the time, hence make experience a
product)

leonardo didn't follow others, didn't find joy in finishing, rather in the
process, discovery, that made him unique and the force that pushed him made him
great

 --- we often fall under pressure of social acceptance

my belief is that i was lucky to be socially isolated so that i could hear and
discover my inner desires, since i was often and mostly alone with myself i
could listen and hear myself and my desires, what to do and where to go (matches
observation from the book Mastery = Robert Greene)

1. discover and understand inner self as deeply as possible
  * what do i wish?
  * what pattern repeats in my life?
  * what have i been doing as a child?
  * what have i always tended to as especially as child?
  * what do i like to do with strong passion and desire?
2. look for career path (the choice is critical)
  * work must be my call, my desire, push, my * VACATION *, like hearing voice
    from the god
  * which activities suit my character, work is who i am, a sense of my vocation
  * i must see it as a journey rather than straight line
  * choose what tends to my inclanations
  * move to related fields that fire me up (take what i do for others and make
    it my own)
  * it will spark that child like sense of wonder, i will learn quickly and
    deeply
  * i can reclaim my independence, i will determine my own circumstances
  * what we lack the most is a sense of larger purpose, what is my purpose?

----

each of these obstacles will occur:

- voices of others nfecting me
- fighting over limited resources
- choosing wrong paths
- getting stuck in the past
- losing my way

----

- a desire to repeat an activity that you never get tired of
- a subject that stimulated an unusual degree of curiosity
- feelings of power attached to particular actions

it is already there, there's no need to dig, it has always been there

----

# occupy the perfect niche - the darwenian strategy

i should follow all actions that completely occupy me in such a way that time
feels like it doesn't exist, only me and what i am thinking about, a sense of
complete, full, and intense focus that makes it feel like the time stops and
only my world exists

* a fight for resources, politics, etc, is bound to consume me and be very
  tiresome

1. find a niche that corresponds with my desires as closely as possible
  * first is ramachandran's way - from within chosen field look for side paths
    that attract me, like ramachandran went from shells, to medical, to
    neurology, to even narrower field where he researched phenomenon where
    patients without limbs feel the pain
  * second is the Matsuoka path, once you have mastered one field, look for
    another to conquer, like robotics, neuroscience, she built robotic arm that
    closely resembles human's arm, on my own time, combine the new field or
    making novel connections, continue the process as long as i wish, she never
    stopped expanding, creating a field that's my own

    (culture where the information is so widely available - and in which
    connecting ideas is a form of power)
Set my own agenda and do whatever I want.

# avoid the false path - the rebellion strategy

wolfgang amadeus mozzart's father was halting his progress because he was
jeallous of his son's proficiency and wolfgang wanted to compose more than
anything else
wolfgang had to make an important choice and decided to stay because he wanted
to compose, his father was angry that wolfgang was rebelious
wolfgang felt that he lost so much time was composing operates like nothing else

**__IF IT IS ATTENTION WE NEED, THAT IS THE FALSE REASON TO CHASE THE PATH.
MAYBE I SHOULD RECONSIDER ALL THAT I'VE DONE AND ALL THAT I'M DOING. I BELIEVE I
HAVE DONE SOME THINGS FOR ATTENTION, LIKE THE THINGS I CHASE. I SHOULD FEEL THE
BURNING DESIRE TO DO WHAT I DO FOR THE SAKE OF DOING IT. THE WORK I DO SHOULD BE
FULFILLING AND GIVE ME A SENSE OF ACCOMPLISHMENT WHEN I GET LOST IN IT. THAT IS
A SCARY IDEA THAT EVERYTHING I'VE BEEN DOING SO FAR IS FOR THE WRONG REASONS.
DIVE DEEP WITHIN MYSELF AND REMEMBER WHAT WAS IT THAT I USED TO LOVE DOING. I
OFTEN HAVE THE EXHILARATING FEELING WHEN I USE COMPUTER IN SOME WAYS I THOUGHT
WERE UNTHINKABLE. I LOVED PLAYING WITH COMPUTER WHEN I WAS A CHILD, LOSING
MYSELF IN THE IMMERSIVE EXPERIENCE OF VIRTUAL EXPERIENCE. I LOVED PLAYING GAMES
AND THE PIXELS ON THE SCREEN HAD A NEW MEANING. I REMEMBER THE IMMERSIVE FEELING
OF USING COMPUTER AND HAVING STUFF ON THE SCREEN BEHAVE AS I WANTED THEM TO. I
NEVER BEFORE FELT SUCH A THING. I LOVED THE INTERNET AND GRAPHICS GAMES, THAT
WAS THE FIRST THING EVER THAT HAS CONSUMED ME AND I WANTED TO GET CONSUMED IN IT
EVER SINCE. WHAT IS IT THAT I TRULY SEEK AND DESIRE? IS IT ENDORSEMENT? DO I GET
THE FEELING I HAVE FROM THE COMPUTER? I FEEL TRULY HAPPY WHEN MY WORK PROVIDES
HAPPINESS TO OTHERS. THE REACTIONS ARE PRICELESS. AM I ON THE RIGHT PATH?__**