switch to jupyter-build, bump NodeJS from 18 to 22

[jameslamb]

Fixes #286

This project's been using jupyter labextension build at build time, but that's been deprecated and jupyter-builder (which pulls the build-time parts out of jupyterlab) is now recommended. See https://jupyterlab.readthedocs.io/en/4.6.x/extension/extension_migration.html#migrating-to-jupyter-builder

This PR's motivated by an unrelated SSL issue in downloading some packages... switching to jupyter-builder also removes that download and unblocks CI. But switching from a deprecated to an officially-supported pattern seems worth doing.

This also updates to NodeJS 22 in build environments. jupyter/builder uses rspack which uses some patterns that require at least NodeJS 22, otherwise you hit this in builds:

INFO:hatch_jupyter_builder.utils:> /tmp/build-env-_mdxzadu/bin/jlpm run build:prod
Building extension in .
/__w/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/node_modules/@jupyter/builder/lib/build-labextension.js:79
const core_1 = require("@rspack/core");
               ^

Error [ERR_REQUIRE_ESM]: require() of ES Module /__w/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/node_modules/@rspack/core/dist/index.js from /__w/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/node_modules/@jupyter/builder/lib/build-labextension.js not supported.
Instead change the require of index.js in /__w/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/node_modules/@jupyter/builder/lib/build-labextension.js to a dynamic import() which is available in all CommonJS modules.
    at Object.<anonymous> (/__w/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/jupyterlab-nvdashboard/node_modules/@jupyter/builder/lib/build-labextension.js:79:16) {
  code: 'ERR_REQUIRE_ESM'
}

That change has no impact on users, NodeJS is only a build-time dependency here and its version doesn't meaningfully impact the built artifacts.

[jameslamb]

All of the changes in this file were made automatically by the hooks in pre-commit, based on the changes I made manually in package.json.

[ncclementi]

Thanks for updating this @jameslamb

[jameslamb]

/merge